Your Happiness Is Determined By One Thing


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Written by: Brandon Epstein

I don’t know about you, but the experience of happiness is one of my favorite experiences to have.

There is something I want you to understand though.

Happiness is just that – an experience.

Nothing more, nothing less.

As a society, we have framed happiness as a state of being that one either lives in continually or doesn’t.

You and I both know that’s not true.

We have many experiences of emotions that put us all over the spectrum of emotion.

When you experience happiness or sadness, that doesn’t mean you are a happy or sad person. All it means is that you are having a happy or sad experience.

The beauty of life is that it occurs on this spectrum of experiences that give us context to experience the more positive emotions with greater satisfaction.

Without the experience of frustration, triumph wouldn’t be so sweet.

Without the experience of being alone, you would never be able to feel how incredible it is to be in love.

The spectrum of experience is a gift that we should all cherish dearly.

The key to living a happy life is to understand this spectrum and the cycle of experience and design a life that highlights all of the wonderful experiences in your life.

Let me explain…

Ultimately, we want to experience as many happy experiences as possible, so that we can live what I believe we should all be striving towards – a fulfilling life.

The way you highlight these happy experiences is by matching your blueprint of happiness to what a happy experience is with your current experience.

For example, if you believe that your happiness is determined by whether or not you are in a loving, intimate relationship and you are in this relationship – then you will be having a lot of happy experiences.

On the other end of the spectrum, if you believe that your happiness is determined by whether or not you are in a loving, intimate relationship and you are currently single – then you could be in a world of hurt.

The cool thing about all of this is that it’s nothing more than a game – a game of constantly stretching out and striving for a better experience, but balancing that with enjoying the present moment you are in at this time.

You can desire an amazing, intimate relationship, but it does not need to be attached to what your blueprint for a happy life is. It can just be supplementary.

This can be a tricky game at times, but this is the thrill of life!

The human condition is to want to experience better.

BUT, ultimately, YOU are in control of your current experience.

You always have a choice in which you decide if what you are experiencing is in alignment with what your blueprint is for happiness.

An extreme example that I have been exposed to as of late is the happiness I see in the homeless I have been working with down in Colombia. Some of them don’t have shoes or all their teeth, but they have decided that a happy experience can be aligned with their current circumstances.

So many of them walk around with toothless grins, emitting positive and loving energy. And it’s contagious in the best way!

I can honestly say that, if I swapped places with these people, I would not be experiencing a ton of happy experiences, because my reality would be completely out of alignment with my blueprint for what I want in my life.

That’s okay, though. I choose to have a blueprint that stretches me to grow and expand.

I also choose to see my current life circumstances to be aligned with what I believe happiness to be.

So, most of the time, I am a very happy dude.

All this to say that… your happiness is determined by one thing.

Does your current experience align with what you have decided in your mind to be your blueprint of happiness?

This is ultimately up for you to decide, but I encourage you to design a life that allows you to experience as much happiness possible.

The ball is now in your court, my friend – let’s play.

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Brandon Epstein

Brandon Epstein

Fat Loss Coach at
Brandon Epstein is a former college football player, turned professional fitness model and serial entrepreneur. These days he spends his time helping people look great and feel awesome over at He can also be found hosting the Zen Dude Fitness Podcast where he’s always looking for new ways to make fat loss fun, simple and efficient for everybody.
Brandon Epstein

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