This Is What’s Stopping You From Feeling Accomplished

Businessman shouting her victory to the world

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Written by: Christine Obee

I hadn’t recognized it in myself. Then I read this…

“You see, my self-worth was tied to how much I accomplished. I thought that if I could speed up things around me, then I could get more done. If I did that, then I would be more valued, therefore more loved and therefore happier.” Judith Lasater

Does this resonate with you?

The underlying NEED to why you want to succeed is stopping you from feeling like you’ve done enough.

As a result, you may be stuck in a continuous cycle that look something like this:

  • When you don’t feel you’ve accomplished enough, you push harder.
  • Pushing harder leads to an even more frantic pace of life and higher stress levels.
  • Your body is impacted by shallow breath and tense muscles.
  • Your mind is affected by a shorter attention span, less patience and an unkind inner voice that beats you up for not doing more or enough.

Can you see how this cycle is a detriment? It is never going to matter how much you accomplish in a day. There is always going to be more to do.

The question is, WHY are you striving to get so much done? If Judith’s words resonated as much with you as they did with me, it’s that ultimately, you’re striving for happiness. Or maybe it’s something else.

What’s YOUR Underlying Need?

To be:

  • Valued?
  • Accepted?
  • Seen as worthy?
  • Loved?
  • Happy?

Maybe all of the above?

I encourage you to explore this, to spend a bit of time thinking about what this underlying need could be and therefore what is motivating you to push yourself.

I remember being on the beach in Nicaragua. I stopped dead in my tracks when I read that quote from Judith Lasater’s book and thought ‘holy crap, that’s me.’  

The best part? The book I read these words from was just one of the many that I had put on my holiday ‘to-read’ list. The reading list was part of the whole ‘to-do’ list I’d written to make sure I used my vacation time as effectively as possible – so I could accomplish MORE (naturally).

Armed with the knowledge of this underlying need, I was able to give myself a break, to let go of the never-ending to-do list.

Don’t get me wrong, I still have a to-do list (I’m not crazy enough to get rid of it completely). I’ve just changed it up a little bit.

Try applying these tips in your life and see how they work for you. My hope is that you will feel more spacious, less stressed and able to accomplish all that is needed (realistically) each day.

1. Include only the top 3 priorities for the day. Save the rest.

2. Give yourself more time than you think you need for each task. Do this without guilt.

3. When things get hectic, tell yourself “I have the exact amount of time today that I need to accomplish everything I’m supposed to.” Find peace in this because it’s true.

Discover what’s motivating you. Give yourself a break. Apply the 3 tips above and allow yourself to move through your day a little easier, calmer.

See if you can discover a greater sense of time. An ability to really see what’s going on around you. A sense of lightness, fun and adventure in your day.

What might happen next? Who might you meet? What kind of conversations might you have?

Give yourself this by letting go of the unattainable, surface-level need to accomplish enough and before you know it, you will be succeeding each and every day, no matter what.

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Christine Obee
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Christine Obee

Lifestyle Design Coach and Yoga Teacher at Christine Obee
Christine is certified as a Lifestyle Design Coach and Yoga Teacher. Having made the transition from a draining, ‘just paying the bill’s’ job to doing work she loves, Christine now helps others in their own transitions. Through personalized coaching programs that combine practical methods with energetic and spiritual concepts, she moves professionals from a place of being disengaged and unfulfilled to finding clarify, hope and purpose.
Christine Obee
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