“The fears we don’t face become our limits.” – Robin Sharma
Today, my friend Stephanie Kwong is going to talk to you about how to overcome fear. We’re really excited to be bringing people from our community into our videos so THANK YOU, Stephanie for being a part of our movement and sharing your beautiful gifts of inspiration with the world. We appreciate you!
Fear is something I’m willing to bet you have been familiar with at some point in your life – maybe even right now! “I used to struggle with anxiety. There were many things I really wanted that I didn’t go for because my fear would paralyze me and hold me back. As I’ve grown, I’ve discovered ways to work with my fear in a healthy and pro-active way.” – Stephanie Kwong
Fear Has A Beneficial Purpose
I want to encourage you to change your perspective on fear. Fear isn’t your enemy. Fear is natural. Fear is hardwired into us as humans and that’s a good thing, because fear keeps us alive! It’s there to protect us and keep us safe. But in certain circumstances, like when it comes to living our full potential, taking risks and going after the things we want, we have to learn to overcome fear.
Today I want to help you use fear to your advantage instead of letting it stop you. Although fear can feel paralyzing and defeats more people than any other force in the world, it’s not as powerful as it seems.
Here’s a little secret: Fear is only as deep as your mind allows. You are still 100% in control. Fear itself cannot touch you. There are ways to shift your brain’s instinctive response from panic and fear to one that can help you to handle stress differently so it’s not holding you back. Use the following steps to help you take action in life and move forward.
If you’re ready, I’ve got 4 powerful ways for you to become the boss of your fears so you can live YOUR life to your FULL POTENTIAL.
4 Ways To Overcome Fear
#1. Recognize Fear Is An Emotion
“The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.” – Franklin D. Roosevelt
Fear is an emotional state that we experience. It’s really no different than happiness, sadness, anger, confidence, or inner peace. These are all different states of emotion. In order to experience certain emotional states, there’s a pattern that we all experience in our body, our minds and our language.
When we experience fear, there’s a pattern with how we hold our body. Our shoulders are usually hunched over or up near our ears, our breathing is shallow, we have a pattern of things that we say to ourselves that are negative or self-defeating and a pattern of where we’re focusing our mind, which is the worst possible outcome.
If you change one of those patterns, you can already create a shift in feeling the fear.
The pattern that shifts you out of fear the fastest is when you use your body. And, one of the most powerful ways to use your body to shift your state from fear to calm is through your breath. When you notice you’re being hijacked by fear, start taking some slow, deep breaths.
Slow, deep breaths are scientifically proven to short circuit anxiety by slowing your heart rate and calming your body. Also, if you purposely breathe out longer than you breathe in, your body has to calm right down (regardless of what tricks your imagination is playing on you). Fear and peace cannot co-exist at the same time. Breathe for at least a minute, or for however long you need to help you feel a sense of peace.
#2. Speak To Yourself With Love
“Fight your fears and you’ll be in the battle forever. Face your fears and you’ll be free forever.” – Lucas Jonkman
A powerful influencer over the emotions we feel is our language. What are you saying to yourself that causes fear? Are you saying things like, “I suck, I can’t do this, they won’t like me, I’m not smart enough, or what if they judge me?” If you are hypnotizing yourself with a pattern of language that is negative, that will keep you stuck in fear.
When that fear is kicking in, shift your language and speak to yourself in a loving and compassionate way. Positive self-talk is a game changer and it can override the brain’s fear signal that is going off in your mind. When you’re afraid, speak words that will shift you into a new emotional state. For example, if you want to feel confident, what would you say to yourself? You’d probably say things like: “I can do this. This will work out. Other people do this all the time, so can I.” Or, “I’m a badass, I got this!” Choose words and phrases that will empower you versus limit you to shift you out of fear.
#3. Visualization Exercises
“I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear.” – Nelson Mandela
When you visualize or keep seeing an activity in your mind, your subconscious mind thinks it’s happening in reality. If you keep mentally rehearsing or visualizing something in your mind, over and over again, it won’t feel so scary when you actually do it because your mind thinks you’ve done it before. Consciously visualize yourself being CONFIDENT and CALM in whatever situation that kicks up your fear. Just see yourself handling it like a boss without breaking a sweat! When you do this mental rehearsal, you want to create a vivid picture in DETAIL and engage all your senses. Really submerse yourself in it, feel yourself breathing calmly, hear yourself speaking confidently, even picture what you’re wearing and how awesome your hair looks. You want to visualize every detail you can and do it over and over again.
Most of all, let yourself feel calm and confident, or whatever it is that you want to feel. The emotions you feel are the most important part. You really want to drop into the feeling, because when you do that, you’re going to condition this new feeling to replace fear. #4. Take Action
“If you want to conquer fear, don’t sit at home and think about it. Go out and get busy.” – Dale Carnegie
Even though you may feel afraid, remember, it’s just an emotion. It doesn’t have to dictate what you do. Feel the fear and do it anyway. You have to go for it. Do not let it hold you back. Do not let it stop you.
You have to embrace this challenge fear is offering you, because fear is always an opportunity for you to rise higher.
Often when you take the action and get to the other side, you find that it’s not as bad as you’ve imagined it to be. Those are some powerful ways to work with your fears so you can stay in action to go after what you want. I’m telling you, you got this!
A head full of fears has no room for dreams. And the pain of regret is SO much greater than the pain of fear.
I’d love to know which new practice you’re going to take on to kick your fear to the curb. Please leave a comment and be the boss of your fear!
Remember, we’re in this together.
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Stephanie Kwong is a transformational life coach, hypnotherapist and speaker on a mission to empower and inspire people to love themselves and live their greatest lives. She believes in the power we all have to transform our belief systems and habits and uses a combination of science, metaphysics, coaching and hypnotherapy to make it happen. In addition to working one-on-one with clients, she created a ‘40 Day Self-Love Transformation’ online program that has helped thousands around the world increase their sense of worthiness and self-love. Her current obsession is creating her upcoming podcast ‘Rise Higher’ sharing unfiltered stories, mindsets and practical tools from people who have elevated their lives to achieve success. She’s also releasing her “Miracle Mindset Mastery,” which shows how to rewire your subconscious beliefs to create miracles and abundance in your life. Outside of her work, Stephanie’s favorite things are the people in her life, good food, passport stamps and being a dancing machine.
Check out the ‘40 Day Self-Love Transformation challenge here.
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