Beauty Is A Matter Of Perspective: How To Love Yourself Unconditionally
By Kavata Kithome
I’m sure that you have marvelled at the great pyramids, the Parthenon, the Roman coliseum and any building that has been standing for 100 years or more. The conditions these great big structures have weathered are immense, yet there they are, just for you to remember.
While viewing them, did you think that they were unsightly, decaying, crumbling and lacking in youthful modernity? Or were you just blown away by their beauty and found yourself at a loss for words at their structural magnificence as you tried to fathom all they have seen throughout time?
The concept of beauty in this day and age is associated with youthful exuberance, yet we have living legends like Sidney Poitier, Pattie LaBelle, Jane Fonda and Gloria Steinem who seem to redefine the very concepts of beauty everyday.
The aging process involves changes in every façet of our lives. Aging offers unbounded gifts that show themselves often in unexpected ways, gifts like wisdom, more love and appreciation for your life experience and, hopefully, a healthy maturation of the perception of beauty.
Oprah coined it beautifully when she said, “I refuse to let a system or a [youth-obsessed] culture or a distorted view of reality tell me that I don’t matter. I know that only by owning who and what you are can you start to step into the fullness of life. Every year should be teaching us all something valuable. Whether you get the lesson is really up to you.”
It can be difficult to embrace aging as strongly as Oprah has, especially since we live in a society that romanticizes youthful beauty so much; that your self-worth is often tied with what you look like. Because of that, you are taught that beauty – and therefore youth – is valuable and should be held onto for dear life.
Physical beauty is a construct and is almost always fleeting as values and consciousness change. The idea of physical beauty changes throughout history; as the saying goes, beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
I believe our fear of aging comes from a lack of a strong foundation for what beauty really means and how to age gracefully and not try so hard to hold onto something as fleeting as physical beauty. We often judge ourselves harshly when we don’t look a certain way and go to great – often unhealthy – lengths to achieve these looks.
Here is a freeing thought: “you don’t have to change your appearance to be beautiful, you are beautiful just as you are.”
One of the many gifts that comes with age is self-acceptance, which leads to choosing a spiritual life and observation of the heart, understanding that the way we temper changes of aging certainly affects our quality of life.
Here is a simple affirmation when you find yourself being self-critical:
“I love myself and am loved. I know in my heart that I am beautiful. I know that life is a process and I will go through different stages of learning and aging, but the core of me will not change. Though I may look different as I get older, my own unique beauty will not lessen.”
Try saying this to yourself daily – as many times as you need to – until you actually believe it! Because it’s true! You ARE beautiful. Your imperfections are what make you uniquely YOU and THAT is an incredibly beautiful and powerful truth to remember.
Tell us, how do you stay grounded and remind yourself of your amazing attributes? The world needs what you’ve got… share your light!
Kavata Kithome is an advocate for living your best life, full of health and longevity. While working closely with gym owners and personal trainers, she was able to sculpt a well-rounded view of fitness and understands how to incorporate it with a healthy balanced diet. She is a regular contributor to the One More Step Lifestyle brand.
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