So, you want more confidence. You want to have more power when you speak. You want to speak in a way that people will hear you, listen to you, maybe even follow you. You want to wake up in the morning and feel like you are capable of conquering your task list of the day. You want to go to sleep at night assured that you are the one running your life
Or maybe you just want to be able to walk down the road with your chin up and a surety in your step. Maybe you simply want to look people in the eye and make them think you’ve got something.
I’ve been where you are.
I use to be incredibly unsure of myself. Some days I still am! But through my own desire to find that underlying confidence I’ve seen in the eyes of my mentors, I have learned a few things.
First of all: We can gain more confidence by tackling its opposite…
I like to refer to insecurity as “IN-SCARCITY.”
When we are living in this state of in-scarcity, our focus is on what is lacking… what we are missing… where we don’t measure up… what is SCARCE.
We look at things as being limited. And this makes us feel inadequate and live in a state of anxiety and fear.
It is time to rid your world of insecurity, my friend! And here’s how you can do it.
#1 Share Your Insecurities
“When we find the courage to share our experiences and the compassion to hear others tell their stories, we force shame out of hiding and end the silence.” – Brene Brown
This step may seem a bit surprising to you. Why would you want to share the very insecurities you are trying to get rid of?
When you share what makes you insecure, when you create a space to share the pieces of yourself that are vulnerable and provide the same space for someone else…
IT IS IN OUR VULNERABILITY THAT WE, AS HUMAN BEINGS, CONNECT.
So approach someone you trust and create a space where the two of you can do some serious soul-searching and watch how the two of you walk away closer than you have ever been before.
#2 Appreciate Everything
“There is a calmness to a life lived in gratitude, a quiet joy.” – Ralph H. Bloom
When you wake up in the morning, what are the first things you think about?
I want to challenge you to spend some real time in the morning to look for what you have to be grateful for. What things of value can you see in your life? What blessings have been put in your lap? What things have brought you joy? What things have helped make you strong.
Some mornings this practice will be easier than others. Some days you are going to wake up and not want to express gratitude for a dang thing.
There will be a day (perhaps many) when the ONLY THING you can think to be grateful for is your breathe. The oxygen flowing in and out of your lungs.
That’s a lot to be grateful for.
#3 Comparison Detox
“Comparison is the thief of joy.” – Theodore Roosevelt
If there is one thing I wish I could strip from your life, it would be the way you compare yourself to those around you.
When we compare, we tell ourselves that we are not good enough. And that is a tragedy. To undermine and demean a child of the universe whose worth is no less than the stars and the planets that surround them… it is the kind of self talk that none of us should be involved in.
I compare myself all the time to the TV shows I watch and the people whose lives I (mistakenly) think are better than mine.
Just the other day I watched a show called Billions about a guy who was a multi-billionaire. Sure enough, I started to compare my lifestyle to his… I saw what he had and compared it to what I do not have.
WARNING: THIS IS A TRAP!!!
Comparison will rob you of the joy and satisfaction you can feel when you view yourself as a unique individual that has no need to compare.
Would you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree?
Or an apple on its ability to taste like a banana?
Water because it fails to taste like wine?
I hope you get my point.
YOU are on a unique and personal journey and are standing exactly where you are meant to. If you need someone to compare with… take a good look at the person staring back at you in the mirror. The comparisons should end there.
Here’s my challenge: Try a 7 day comparison detox.
When you look around you and start feeling those comparing thoughts enter your mind, write them down, crumple up that paper and let them go.
#4 Return To Your Childhood Innocence
“Be happy for no reason, like a child. If you are happy for a reason, you’re in trouble, because that reason can be taken from you.” – Deepak Chopra
The most beautiful thing about being a child was that we lived for the present moment. And when you live in the moment….
You can’t have anxiety for the future
You can’t have guilt and shame from the past
You WILL have is an awareness of the now
You WILL be in a state of love
Remember being a child and running on the playground and doing things with no fear or insecurities? I want you to strive to return to that.
Take 20 minutes every day to do something that you did as a kid!
Dance, sing, run, play, laugh, put together a lego or a puzzle, ride your bike, put on roller skates, climb and sit in a tree, read a fun book, roll down a grassy hill, color, paint, be creative, etc.
Anything that pulls you into the moment and makes you feel like a kid again.
Remember the four things we talked about to turn your insecurities into outrageous confidence:
#1 Share Your Insecurities
#2 Appreciate Everything
#3 Try A Comparison Detox
#4 Return To Childhood Innocence
Let me know what you think… do any of these steps work for you? Comment below.
Stay tuned for our future videos where the FitLife team and I will go out into the streets with no scripts to show you LIVE what these Mindset Mondays are all about! Subscribe to our YouTube channel so you don’t miss out.
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Drew Canole is a rockstar in the world of fitness, nutrition and mindset, with a huge heart for others and doing his part to transform the world, one person at a time.
As the founder and CEO of Fitlife.TV, he is committed to sharing educational, inspirational and entertaining videos and articles about health, fitness, healing and longevity. He is also a best selling author and the founder of Organifi, an organic, incredibly delicious greens powder, chock-full of superfoods to make juicing easy no matter your busy schedule.
During my FitLife transformation, I lost 70 pounds! That's why I signed up for the protocol, but the most exciting result is that I found ME in the process. I had been hiding under a pile of pounds, self-doubt, and grief! FitLife changed my life and I knew I had to share it with others.
-Lynne, Longwood FL
I started with Fitlife back in 2011-2012…I wrote into Fitlife asking for an extreme amount of help. I was 300 pounds, with high cholesterol, and Drew helped me transform my life. I lost over 130 pounds and I no longer have high cholesterol. Not only did I lose weight, so did my husband, who lost over 70 pounds!